Day-planning for pre-teens

Props for Snood

Open-source child-rearing

Dig this: A couple have set up a Wiki devoted to their baby, who’s due in a few weeks — and are thus allowing random strangers to give them advice on how to raise their child. It’s a neat sort of judo move: Since parents are battered with unsolicited advice from strangers anyway about what they’re doing wrong, why not just formalize the arrangement and give the world a quick and easy way to mouth off?

Thus, the following bits of advice:

Spend a lot of time at nightclubs and noisy events during the last couple months of your pregnancy. The child will come out unusually calm and unafraid of loud noises.

Or …

Right when you get the baby home, drop it on the floor. Then every time for the rest of her life remember the horror you felt when you dropped the newborn and nothing will stress you out, it will be impossible to feel worse as a parent than intentionally dropping your newborn on the ground — and then you can say say to yourself “if she survived that she’ll surive anything else we inflict on her.” (being grounded, no pony, etc.)

Then again, some of the stuff is useful. The parents are apparently seriously considering naming the kid “Wyoming”, and as one contributor sagely noted, “the only person I’ve ever met named Wyoming was a stripper.”

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I'm Clive Thompson, the author of Smarter Than You Think: How Technology is Changing Our Minds for the Better (Penguin Press). You can order the book now at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Powells, Indiebound, or through your local bookstore! I'm also a contributing writer for the New York Times Magazine and a columnist for Wired magazine. Email is here or ping me via the antiquated form of AOL IM (pomeranian99).

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